bittersweet chocolate symphony of string cheese

i went to the symphony. bought tickets at the last minute and cursed myself for it when i realized i was 4 rows from the worst seats in the house. it's music, what have you got to hear? that isn't it. it's my pretension. i am wearing a theory overcoat, matching pants and a tailored boss shirt and people are seeing me in this, walk all the way up here. stupid pretension.

i sit down next to a woman who is there alone. she is takes pictures until the usher yells. i cringe for her but she is sweet and the scene is kind of sad. two lesbians sit directly in front of me. they wear something like crushed velvet dresses that could be from deb's. they are eating tater skins, bacon-cheddar flavored until they are stopped by the usher and i think, how horrible. these seats. that bacon. those taters.

and then i god damn remember five years ago, almost to the date, after a varsity basketball game hot-boxing my beige toyota corolla with 4 friends and driving 90 minutes to a strip club in southern iowa. it was so foggy that we couldn't tell whether the fog was inside or out. we were visiting pulsating suzy. she was our favorite. i remember her doing a trick with my hat that left it permanently stained and i remember her telling me that she thought i was sweet. where does sweetness go then?

what am i fighting and why? just who the fuck do i think i am?

the next time i go to the symphony i will bring funyons. because one, four, seven years to every day i was doing something down to earth and... oh, maybe pringles instead. pringle claws!